Hope

In the scheme of things life is pretty darn good. I'm grateful for a stable life and a good family and amazing friends that are surely heaven sent. Thank goodness we have all those things because the last few months have been intense. In October we realized that things were stressful for jack at school. The gap between him and and his peers began to widen and it became very obvious that we needed to get some help beyond ourselves. 

Luckily back in June I had a day where I knew I had to find a good counselor for Jack. I sat down at the computer and did some research and found a great guy. He was very good with Jack and I really liked him. By October he recommended that we put Jack in an intensive outpatient program at our children's hospital. This was a big move for us. I was hesitant to do it because it was a five week commitment and we would have to pull him out of school. By this point I was at the school every day trying to help jack figure out the math hat was completely overwhelming to him. Luckily because of Jason's back surgery in February we had met our deductible and could afford to put jack in the program, another miracle. 

Jack entered the program in November and it was so painful for me initially. I cried the first day we dropped him off because I couldn't believe it had come to this. I felt like I hadn't done enough for him. Those feelings of anguish quickly turned to relief as I saw how amazing the program was. I was astounded that no one had told us this before. Jack was observed for five hours a day by different psychologists and psychiatric doctors and nurses who were able to pinpoint exactly what his struggles were. We attended our own parenting classes and counseling sessions and formed our own outside team of specialists that will continue to help Jack. The biggest change we made was transferring him to a small, private school which will help  him find more success with a better curriculum for his learning style. 

We love this adorable kid and his energy and everything he brings to our family. We want to help him be the best he can and have a beautiful life. We can never take away the early trauma he experienced his first two years of life and we are only beginning to understand it ourselves. One of the sweetest moments came as I was walking down the hospital corridor reeling from the many diagnosis he had been given and I received a distinct impression and promise that in the eternal scheme of things all would be well for Jack. That is the great hope of the healing power of the atonement. I know that I can trust that promise. It doesn't mean that there won't be a struggle that is ongoing and that our life is going to be carefree. But we can have peace knowing that healing is possible.