Power of Moms Retreat

Most of the time I am pretty confident in my abilities as a mother but when those low moments hit, they hit hard and I feel like an utter and complete failure.

Tonight was the perfect example. I had a plan: Potato soup and warm sourdough bread for dinner, banana bread straight from the oven for dessert, kids cheerfully doing their after dinner jobs, family scripture study focusing on day three of the Savior’s last week on earth and tucking the kids in at 8:00. My plans were derailed. Jonah came home from track practice with a cute girl I’ve never met to do homework. They walked right in and went straight to raid the pantry, even though dinner was in the works. I was peeling potatoes for the soup when Jack got upset about something and I knew a task like peeling potatoes would be the perfect thing to calm him down.

He didn’t think that was such a great idea and I had to chase him around a bit to get him going on the job. Just as Jack settles in Eli, who has been outside exercising, walks in with another friend and they too decide to raid the pantry right before dinner. That only gets everyone else going on the food and before I know it everyone thinks it’s time for a snack. I get the brilliant idea to assign Eli and his friend to go outside and assemble our trampoline which the kids have been begging to put back up.

They accept the challenge and all the little kids are so excited about the prospect that they all head out too. Great, now I have some peace in the kitchen. Next thing I know I hear the hose going. It’s only a matter of minutes before everyone is all wet and needs to come in and change. Meanwhile, the potato soup is way too watery and needs more potatoes. I peel and boil five more potatoes while helping kids coming in and out with muddy hands from the mud pies they are making and answering Jonah’s questions about homework. Finally at 6:45 dinner is done and we can finally sit down to eat this declicious bowl of homemade goodness, except due to all the earlier snacking no one is hungry and I am left with a big pot of soup. Bonus, tomorrow’s dinner is made.

I finally have to suggest that the boy’s friends go home so we can do scripture study and as soon as we sit down Jack grabs a snack from the pantry. I completely lose it and turn scripture study over to the boys (oh, and where’s Jason? Driving home from Seattle). I put Jack straight to bed which is exactly what he needs and he settles down quickly doing math problems and reading a book. I head back upstairs and the kids are done with scripture study. Eli asks for something to eat and I lose it again. Finally, everyone brushes their teeth and by 9:30 they are all in bed.

I want to do better and that is why I headed to SLC last weekend for a Power of Mom’s retreat. When I saw the Power of Moms website advertise their upcoming retreat it only took a nano-second for me to decide that I was going. I am so happy that Kelly and Betsy decided to join me too.

unfortunately, this is our only picture. We stopped by temple square before the retreat.

We were absolutely giddy from the moment we arrived soaking in all the great energy of being surrounded by other moms who want to do better. The retreat was held at Richard and Linda Eyre’s home which was so amazing for many of the attendee’s. I have been reading their books since Eli was a baby so to meet them and their darling girls was a highlight.

On Friday April Perry, co-founder of Power of Moms gave the most amazing seminar on Mind Organization for Moms. She has adapted an existing program geared toward business executives and made it perfect for the home executive. This isn’t a workshop on how to organize your kitchen or any other area of the home but it is a way to organize your MIND. I can see so much potential in this program for me, especially since I have so many ideas, worries, obligations churning around in my mind. This was probably the most valuable part of the program for me and since I’ve been home I’ve been working hard to implement it.

Saturday was spent hearing great presentations by Linda Eyre, Richard Eyre, the Eyre daughters. It was great to see them in person after reading so many books over the years. I think it is fabulous that Saren is building on this great legacy he parents have created and that her sisters and parents are so involved. We also heard again from April Perry who is a true inspiration and then from two other great speakers. One was a mom who is dealing with the loss of her baby boy only three months ago. She was so brave to share her story with us while it is so fresh. There wasn’t a dry eye and our mother hearts all grieved together. The other speaker was absolutely engaging and got us all hooked by her great sense of humor. She put us all at ease by explaining that she suffers from sweaty pit syndrome when she speaks. I had so much empathy for her because the same thing happens to me when I speak.

During lunch we did breakout sessions where we got to discuss some of the things we were learning about. I went to the groups on family economy (which we are trying so hard to be consistent with) and another group on establishing margins in our lives. I will write a separate post on both of these topics because I have so many great thoughts.

The thing I loved most about the retreat was the realization that I need to love the moments more. Just like tonight. Even amidst the revolving door and the kids running around and the questions and the mess I was so proud of Eli and his friend for setting up the trampoline and the joy that brought the little kids. I love that after Jack calmed down by peeling a potato or two he went and got a craft project to work on and sat engaged at the table for a long period of time. I was secretly happy for Jonah that he found such a cute girl to do homework with and Emma and I had a fun time giggling about it in the kitchen. I was proud of my boys who took over reading scriptures with their sisters while I put Jack to bed. It wasn’t the perfect evening I envisioned, and it never will be. I owe it to my kids and myself to stop expecting perfection and just embrace the moments. Maybe if I can do that, memories will be made and we’ll have lots to laugh about in the future.

Kelly, of course, summed up the points of the retreat perfectly. Here's what we learned:

Deliberate parenting, not routine parenting

Present parenting, not distracted parenting

Thriving parenting, not surviving parenting

Thanks to the Eyres and Power of Moms for a great weekend. The exact same retreat will be held in May. Go to Power of Moms for more info.